Dear SANDSIV,

As I did last year, I thought I would send you a yearly update on our current Customer Experience Management (CXM) practices, and how they, and you, have helped us up here at the North Pole. In case you need to refresh your memories, our last two updates were published by you at the following URL: 

Having just been told by Rudolph (who you may remember I promoted to CCO some time back) that URL is not an acronym for unsynchronized reindeer legs (a common problem I have when riding my sleigh at high speed), I think I will rely upon what he has told me of our CX position, and simply paraphrase it. As you know, I am not exactly the most tech-savvy person in the world.

Before I do this though, I think I should explain that we have redefined some of the common CXM nomenclatures. I will explain this in advance so that you understand me (I hope).

In order to make life easier for our Elves, who are not too bright, we have tried to keep all CX nomenclature quite closely related to things they already understand, so:

  • Voice of the Customer is now Voice of the Children.
  • CSAT is still CSAT but it now stands for Christmas Satisfaction Score.
  • Big Data is now Not Paper (if you remember we were considering opening up other channels alongside the traditional Christmas begging request letters).
  • Analytics is now Santa Smarts (as the Elves still think I am coming up with all the good ideas ho ho ho!).

So, without further ado, let us continue with the stuff I do not understand, but what Rudolph tells me is entirely correct.

Firstly, we can report that our Not Paper Santa Smarts initiative has worked out very well indeed. We have been using this new technology to recognize trends in gift requirements and jump the gun on stocking them. For example, when we started getting a lot of request letters for Call of Duty: Advanced Warfare at the start of this November, our Santa Smarts tech flagged this for us and enabled us to start buying in advance, to fill the expected demand on December 24th. So a great success for us here.

However, Rudolph is still not satisfied that we are doing everything we can with regards to actioning the Voice of the Children. For the last few weeks, he has been wandering around mumbling about something he calls the ‘moment of truth. Now, this really worried me at first, as for me, the moment of truth is that terrible time when Children start to realize I do not exist, which results in a terrible paradox for me, on a personal level.

Rudolph has put my mind to rest though and explained to me that what he means, is actually following up on our service with some form of the customer satisfaction survey, which will allow us to start using the Voice of the Children to measure how well we are doing.

We have spent many hours trying to design a simple survey, that we will send Children on December 26th, but we are struggling to come up with the right set of questions. So far we have candidates such as the following:

  • On a scale of 0 to 10, how much did Santa smash up your fireplace?
  • On a scale of 1 to 5, how many cookies did Santa eat?
  • On a scale of 0 to 1, did you get the toy you begged for and requested?

I admit openly, that these are all my ideas so far, and Rudolph has not been overly impressed. He has promised to work on his own questions before Boxing Day.

So dear SANDSIV, as you can see, we are still struggling to implement ways to use the Voice of the Children in a better fashion, but we are firmly committed to reaching full CX maturity, and with your help, we believe it is possible.

(Literally) yours, 

Santa Claus

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